She got flowers... history of domestic violence

Every day a lot of women suffer abuse from their partner. Physical, emotional, verbal are some of the abuse they have to deal with. Sometimes, people judge why these women stay in these relationships... why they don’t leave, why they keep tolerating that behavior. It’s simple to give an opinion from the outside, but until you don’t live that type of relationship you don’t how it goes. You don’t know how many demons these women have to battle every day. And by demons, I’m not referring only the ones from their partner but, also, the ones of their own. I think is better to stop blaming these women for staying in the relationship and start asking why their partner have to treat them that way.
I’m sharing with you a poem written by Paulette Kelly where she gives battered women the voice they need.
Take care, Tere

Sometimes the life ride is bumpy

Life pulls you, pushes you, twists you many times without warning. You continue your way regardless of the obstacles. You fall, peel your knees but you keep walking until the fatigue overcomes you.



You recover and take the road again. Sweat and fatigue are your allies. Perseverance joins them when you least expect it. It is then that you realize that on this rocky path that you had to walk and extenuated at times from it; the most important thing is to believe in yourself, trust that every time your life is twisted you will find a way to straighten it and that your knees will be all well again.

Take care, Tere

Blessed in the most unexpected way... my experience with an autistic student.

I'm pretty sure that sometimes you have thought of the blessings you have had or have in your life. Perhaps you think that you haven't been blessed as much as you should be or you compare your blessings to others’ Then life makes sure to take you through unexpected paths. Paths that make you think...

I have lived a blessed life. I had a great childhood and teen's years. I have two sons that are good-hearted men. I come from a family where we share love and care for each other. I have amazing friends who have been there for me always. I'm in good health, both physically and mentally. So, as you can see, I’m blessed.

Recently life decided to bless me in a different way. I started tutoring a kid with advanced autism. I've never worked with a student with autism before and when I was asked to do it, I won't lie; I was very nervous and stressful. But, I did it. I’ve been working with him for three weeks now and it has been a ride that I’ve been enjoying a lot.

He and I made a connection. I was afraid that didn’t happen but, it did and easily. He's happy to see me. I know it not only because he looked happy but because he said it with words. He works hard on his assignments and completes every task. He has shared with me his most beautiful smiles... and what an awesome feeling it is to see him smiling.
 Every Tuesday and Thursday this kid waits for me to be there and tutor him. Every Tuesday and Thursday I can't wait to be there for him.

His presence in my life has shown me another view of life, his view. A unique view where life is not that complicated and where you can be happy with the smallest things, with the smallest gesture of love.
Knowing and tutoring this kid... that is a true blessing!

Take care, Tere

Dating nowadays...at your 40's

I am a 48-year-old woman who was married for 20 something years and after all that time with the same man (as my mom says, lol) I got a divorce. You know what does that means, right. You are single, after all that time, and you are lost in this new world for you, the dating world.  You might not know what to do and you will, most certainly, receive advice or opinions from a lot of people (friends, family, coworkers, etc.). Everybody nowadays talks about dating as if they are expert on the material.

If you go online you will find a lot of material about dating. The ones I like most are all these “pieces of advice” of things you should or shouldn't do when you are dating. Let me share with you some of them. I’m pretty sure you’ll know a couple. You should not kiss until the second date and/or not have sex until the third. If you do any of the two, your relationship will be doomed. Another one is not to text him first; you should let him do it first because he has to chase you, as well as, do not text him again if he hasn’t replied to you. You should just leave it like that, even if you want to tell him something new. Don’t ask him out is another "advice". He can ask you out any time he wants and as many times he wants but you shouldn't because then he might think you are desperate. Another advice is that one should play hard to get, always, not make it too easy for him. A piece of text advice I found interesting is to wait more than 10 minutes before replying to a text and if he took time to reply to yours, then, you should take the double of that time to reply to him. This is to show him that you’re not available for him all the time. The following one, I think it's ridiculous: you should treat the guy badly because they like that, "bad girls". Really? I guess I’m screwed with this one since I’m a good girl. These are some of the "pieces of advice" you can find on the Internet. Incredible, right. The funny thing is that there's a lot of women who follow them and men who want the women to do so. 

I'm not into these silly "pieces of advice", what you see is what you get with me. I’m not getting any younger and I’m not into playing games. I’m straightforward and will share my feelings every time. If I like him I will say so, if I will like to see him I will say it too. I will ask and share my feelings. I will text when I want and reply, most of the time, right away as I do with everyone. I'm a caring woman, so if I feel like sending a text saying that I hope he made it fine, or to wish a happy day, I will do so.
We are not teenagers anymore. We are adults and we have to behave like one.
I know there's a great man for me out there, who will love and respect me. Maybe I'm about to meet him or, perhaps, I already did. Who knows? I just hope that he isn't into games either, likes to share freely his feelings with me (even if I’m not going to like what he feels), and is not following any of these "rules" or "advice" (LOL). He follows his heart, just like me.



In the meantime...I’ll be enjoying this ride.
Share with me what you think about dating, I will love to know!
Take care, Tere

The year 2017 and I (what it taught me)

                                                 

    

We are almost saying goodbye to the year 2017. I can't believe it's almost over...time really flies. I'm sure everyone has had different life experiences happening through the whole year. I wasn't an exception, I had an interesting and, in some way, a peculiar year.

Let me share with you some of the experiences I lived this year: I started the year (February) with one of my sons having a legal problem (falsely accused). He was arrested and transferred to jail. Difficult times dealing with it, I visited him in jail and saw him in that orange uniform and with handcuffed. Thankfully he's out and next month is his last follow up hearing where his case will be closed and he will be without any records on his name.

Also as part of this year experiences, I started two new part-time jobs that I love, tutoring teacher and after-school Spanish teacher. Another of my experiences was hurricane Irma in Orlando, even though I had experienced hurricanes before; this one was kind of scary for me. Hurricane Maria hit Puerto Rico on Sept. 20th (my B-day) leaving my island devastated. This touched my heart in an unexpected way, seeing how all of the Puerto Ricans: family, friends, acquaintances, were suffering and not be able to do anything. This hurricane also touched my professional life, one of my books was going to be published in English but since my publishing company does not have power nor internet yet, that couldn't happen. By the beginning of December, I had my identity stolen and my banks' accounts cleaned (no money). Yayy, great for me! This experience was one of a kind and a hard one to deal with. Lastly, I had to spend Christmas day alone this year. Cheerful, right?

But, as people say, from every situation we learn something...

What I learned from the year 2017?
I learned that is hard sometimes being a parent but still is the most rewarding role I have as a person. I also learned that I have the most amazing friends, who supported me through all of my son's entire situation without judging anything, stood by my side every time I felt I was falling, and lend me a shoulder where I could cry on. This year also taught me that the good ones are way more. I saw it in some people of the justice system as well as in the people that got together and help in different ways the people of my beautiful island, Puerto Rico, after the hurricane. Words can’t express the gratitude I have for those that helped and the ones whio continue doing it. This year, I also learned that even though I had to spend the Christmas day by myself and didn't receive any present; it's not so bad. I got to see a lot of Christmas movies (which I love) and stayed in my pajamas and ate the whole day. The experience of starting the two part-time jobs this year taught me a side of me I didn't know I had, of being a teacher, and I love it. This year also brought me more writing. I've been posting a quote every day, writing more on this blog and on some children's' short stories as well as in an adult book I'm working.  Furthermore, this year taught me that one can meet amazing people in unimaginable places or situations. Finally, this year has been the year of enjoying more my life as it is, trying to live the moment and to always see the positive things, even though I'm dealing with rough times.

I've been through a lot of different and unexpected experiences throughout this year, but I'm grateful for each and every one of them.

Next year (2018)...I will continue my journey. I will keep trying as long as I open my eyes every morning...nothing will stop me.

What did you learn from 2017? Share it wit me!!

Salud to a blessed new year!!
Take care, Tere